Check out this bad boy

 Matt's request this Christmas was a large denim quilt for our bed. Matt loves denim quilts and he wanted one made by me. So I set to work on it. And get this...I started sewing about 12 days ago. Yes, that's right. This quilt is a total of 398 squares (I think?) and I only started sewing a few weeks before Christmas.

 Because it is a 9 patch it came together quickly. Matt specifically requested farm fabric. I looked all over and this was pretty much the only farm fabric (age appropriate, not baby fabric) I could find.

 The denim and colored squares come from clothing we've been saving--old scrubs and jeans. I am completely out of denim now but still have a few scrubs squares left.

 The quilt is so big that I had to move all the furniture to the edges of our dining room to baste it. This is what it looks like on our bed. It comes down to about 8 inches over each side and touches the ground at the end of the bed. I really don't like quilts that barely cover the top of your bed because then you're not covered if you roll over or something. So I made sure this quilt was huge.

 In fact, it is so big that I laid the quilt lengthwise against the width of a king-size flannel sheet (does that make sense?) and I still had to add a 6" piece at the end of the flannel sheet. This green plaid is from Riley Blake's "Fox Trails" collection. I love plaid and Matt loved this fabric.

 I hope you can see how I quilted this. Two quadrants go vertically, two are quilted horizontally. I had to do this because I started from the center and in order to reach the "far side" I would have to roll up the entire quilt and fit it under the arm of my sewing machine. With a quilt this size, that simply wasn't going to happen. So I had to quilt in two different directions since only half the quilt fit under my arm. (Did any of that make sense?)

Admittedly this present took a long time. Matt helped me cut and pin rows together. I stayed up late (about 12 or 1am) finishing this. It was completely worth it. Matt was so happy to have this. He wrapped up in it all Christmas morning. I am so glad I finished it. Seeing him love this was worth every late night and ripped seams. He is worth it.

We have arrived!

The other day, on a rare sunny and slightly warm day, the girls were outside in the background. Nathalie came running inside, crying. When I asked her what was wrong she said, "Emily is ruining my life!"

Emily has a little friend at school she plays with all the time. I asked if the friend was a good listener (I meant a good listener to her teacher). Emily's response? "Yes, she's a good listener. I tell her what to do and she listens to me."

Emily came home from school a few days ago and as we were talking about her day she said, "Mom, do you know who Justin Bieber is?"

Aaaaaand....welcome to parenthood.

Photo Book

 Those big brown eyes are killer!

 Three girls. I had to keep moving backwards because they kept advancing.

 Charlotte's big day. Ear tubes and in her cute baby hospital gown.

 Cutie patootie did great. She was silly and goofy even though she hadn't eaten.

 Only a few hours after the surgery at COSI. You'd never know she'd been under anesthesia. An hour after surgery she was down and running.

 Doctor Nan.

 Emily loved these crutches.

 A long day of surgery and playing leads to tired girls. Don't worry Mom, I was at a stoplight!



I wonder what it'll be like when I have to make four crowns every day!

In about 12 years, this will get interesting

So.

I'm pregnant. 19 weeks, in fact. I'm showing now. Well, I feel like I'm showing but I really just look fat.

This has been a harder pregnancy in a lot of ways. "Harder" is a relative term, since I am one of those blessed women who has easy pregnancies. But it was definitely the pregnancy with the worst morning sickness and the worst fatigue. Emotionally this pregnancy has been a roller coaster as well although the second trimester has definitely been a major improvement.

Anyway, here I am almost halfway done. I've been feeling the baby kick since about 15 weeks-- strong, definite kicks. The baby doesn't move around much, more like it sucker punches me. We told the kids about 3 weeks ago and they ask me every day if the baby is coming out yet. It's going to be a looooong wait until May for them.

In the meantime, Matt and I are starting to brainstorm names. The reason we're brainstorming? We're out of girl names.

Tomorrow is a big day

Tomorrow is Nathalie's first day of preschool. I don't know why I'm so nervous! I keep thinking, "Okay, she needs to be up by 7:25. Okay, have we set out her clothes? What if she cries when she is dropped off? Will she keep her shoes on? What if her teacher doesn't like her? What if she gets in trouble at school?"

We did set out her clothes. Put her to bed at an earlier time because she'll be getting up earlier. Matt gave her a blessing and I've never seen her sit so still and be so reverent.

For goodness sake, preschool is only 2 1/2 hours long! This is a little ridiculous of me.

Awesome possum!

 We went to the Kalahari for our Thanksgiving break. Matt's family had a family reunion there. It was amazing! The Kalahari is an indoor water park. It is enormous and fun and my girls had a blast. The wave pool was a huge hit with Emily who dove straight into each wave and laughed hysterically every time she got bowled over.

 Accurate representation of Nathalie.

 Matt's family, parents and siblings.

 My amazing sister-in-law made a whole bunch of balloon swords to keep everyone occupied during picture taking.

 So hard to get Matt to be willing to take this picture!

 Christmas time in the family.

Adorable.

It was a really fun trip. The Kalahari is located in Sandusky, Ohio and we really had a blast. I highly recommend it!

 We have lots of really cute baby bunnies right now. 17 to be exact. 6 of them are 8 weeks old and bigger. The other 11 are 3 weeks old and cute. The big ones are all dark colored-- a dark gray. Some of them have black ears and a black nose which is adorable.

 Of the little babies, some of dark gray. But others are this beautiful silver color. You have never seen cuter baby bunnies! We even have a little black one with a white sock on his front right foot.

  The bunnies are a daily delight for everyone. Charlotte adores them-- and cannot be left alone with them. But the older girls cuddle them, wrap them in blankets, and one time, they used my hairbrush to brush them! (I got a new brush). The only unfortunate part about baby bunnies is sometimes they pee on you.

I definitely have a soft spot for baby bunnies.

Growth in Motherhood

 For some reason I've been reflective lately. Maybe it has to with the fact that Charlotte is almost the age where Emily was when Nathalie was born. Or maybe it's because I've been reading some wonderful blogs lately and deciding on how I really (really) need to improve my mothering. Whatever the reason, these thoughts have led me to reflections on how I've grown since having children.

 I remember once when Emily was about Charlotte's age. It was winter and I was showering. Emily came into the bathroom and left the door open, lowering the ambient temperature about 5 degrees. I yelled at her to close the door. She didn't. I yelled again. I got out of the shower and was furious (and freezing) to close the door myself.

What a stupid reaction. Emily must have been about 18 months old. Now, I can't even believe I yelled at her! Of course she wouldn't have understood my anger. No, she would only have been hurt by it.

I used to spend a lot more time on the Internet than I do now. In fact, this week I got on facebook for the first time in 2 months. My fb fast was because of politics, actually, but I found that I enjoyed focusing on my family more. And I wasn't drawn to fb anymore. Or the internet. What is fb when compared to interacting with my girls? 

 

 As I watch the girls grow up I am amazed that time literally flies by. Even days I think will drag on somehow seem to end before I have a chance to blink. And when I wake up in the morning, Emily is a little taller, Nathalie knows more letter sounds and Charlotte can say 5 more words. The days used to drag on. The isolation of staying at home was sometimes unbearable. I couldn't always stand my children. (Okay, sometimes all these statements are still true.) But now I feel like I'm grasping at a rope that is slipping through my fingers.

 Emily seems so grown up now. Reading, doing math, helping, wanting to earn money. She acts grown up. She acts like a girl now, instead of a little girl. And Nan is going to preschool next month. I've been pondering and praying for a long time about this but it has become very apparent to me that the best thing for her will be 2 mornings a week away from me. And that's hard. I used to long for the day when the kids weren't around. And I still love my alone time. But now I cherish the time where Emily is all mine. I can't wait to see her after school. And though I feel conviction in the decision for Nathalie, I also don't want to let her go. Somehow she turned into this beautiful preschooler and I don't know when it happened.

It gives me hope that I have improved since Emily was born. And I also feel overwhelmed by my glaring inadequacies. For they are enormous. I hope someday to become the mother I dream of being. The woman who has all the qualities I desire. I have taken some baby steps since beginning, but I'm hoping for some exponential growth here soon because the speed at which I'm improving isn't nearly fast enough to match the speed at which my girls are growing. I just pray that I can be mother enough for them. Somehow God will have to help me be equal to His task of raising my beautiful daughters.

Small Moments

 Sometimes I am completely drained by bedtime. Tired from the endless questions, kids hanging off me, tantrums and crying. After the girls go to bed and I sit and decompress for a long time, I start thinking about the small moments of the day.  Like building pumpkin faces.

Or eating breakfast in style.

Or beautiful girls.

Or watching an 18-month old experience the joy of making popcorn.

It's those small moments that keep me going.

10 pictures

 Welcome back to life with a camera! These are real photographs taken with our new-to-us camera the last three days. Now you can see what my girlies look like currently.